So I present the valuable lessons that I took away from the Earthquake Ride in Universal Studios, Florida:
|Pic via womansday.com|
- The ‘big one’ will happen when I am on a train, so I can plan the other 22 hours of my day accordingly. Be sure to never get on said train without a bag full of water, snacks, flashlights and other emergency paraphernalia.
- If the earth starts moving and you see any type of gas truck – parked, moving, hell, even a picture of a gas truck, it will crash and explode. To avoid being taken out by the flames, just start running Forrest Gump style down the street without looking back.
- Learn to swim, because inevitably, there will be massive flooding and you will drown.
- Remain calm because the ‘ride’ only lasts sixty seconds anyway.
- Footage of you experiencing the earthquake will be all over the news, so be sure not to cry like a baby like you did on the ride. No need to embarrass yourself in public like that again.